December 15, 2013
After Work

(LAURA and JEREMY meet up in a bar; behind the bar, JAVIER is tending)

LAURA

Darling!

JEREMY

Hey there!

LAURA

What are you drinking?

JEREMY

Martinis.

LAURA

I need to catch up…

JEREMY

I just got here.

LAURA

Still, I’m ridiculously sober.

JEREMY

Javier, two martinis for my lady here.

JAVIER

(To Laura)

How would you like them?

LAURA

Traditional; 5 partis gin; 1 part vermouth; stirred, not shaken… with two olives.

JAVIER

I think I love you.

JEREMY

Get in line…

(Javier goes to make the drinks)

LAURA

So how has your day been?

JEREMY

Oh, fine…  just the usual thing.  Waiting to see you…

LAURA

Really?

JEREMY

Absolutely.

LAURA
You shouldn’t do that.

JEREMY

But I love you.

LAURA

I love you too - but still, you shouldn’t do that.  You should live for each minute - not for the next minute.

JEREMY

But you’re all that matters.

LAURA

That’s simply not true.  Time to grow up darling.

JEREMY

But…

(JAVIER brings the drinks)

JAVIER

Here you are.

LAURA

(to JAVIER)

How has your day been?

JAVIER

Filled with seconds.  Like every day.

LAURA
Seconds?

JAVIER

Small moments, like this one.  Punctuated with alcohol.  You meet someone,

you make their drink.  You deliver it.

LAURA

And then what will you do, when this moment ends, and someone else orders a drink?

JAVIER

I’ll make that next drink, of course. 

LAURA

But what if I don’t want you to leave?

JEREMY

Laura…

(The End)

 

October 1, 2012
Characters Rebelling

 
(JOHN and DAVID are walking down a street together, in Basel Switzerland)
 
JOHN
So you’re saying I’m not really here.
 
DAVID
You’re here - it’s just that you’re only here in my head.  You’re a character in this play.
 
JOHN
And what are you?
 
DAVID
I’m the writer…
 
JOHN
Then why are you here, walking next to me?
 
DAVID
I wrote myself into the scene.
 
JOHN
So you’re a character too… since you’re here…
 
DAVID
I mean, sure… in this scene…
 
JOHN
…and I’m really here too, in this scene.
 
DAVID
I mean - sure.  But I’m real.
 
JOHN
You mean in this scene - this is really you?
 
DAVID
No I mean… no… in this scene this is me, as a character.
 
JOHN
Like me.
 
DAVID
Yeah.
 
JOHN
So you’re not real.    Or I am real, like you?
 
DAVID
Wait a minute…
 
(The End)

October 1, 2012
Back At It

 
(JOHN and DAVID are sitting together in Business Class, flying to Germany; David is working on his laptop)
 
JOHN
What are you doing?

DAVID
Writing a  One Minute Play.
 
JOHN
I thought you stopped doing that.
 
DAVID
Yeah, well…  I’m back at it.
 
JOHN
Oh.  So, what’s this one about?
 
DAVID
Just us talking…
 
JOHN
Talking when?
 
DAVID
Talking now.
 
JOHN
You mean you’re just transcribing this conversation?
 
DAVID
Yeah.
 
JOHN
Isn’t that cheating?
 
DAVID
Not really.
 
JOHN
How is that not cheating?  You should be creating something, not
just transcribing a random conversatoin.
 
DAVID
Well, you don’t really exist.  You’re just in my head.
 
JOHN
Wait… what?
 
DAVID
You don’t exist.
 
JOHN
I don’t?
 
DAVID
No.
 
JOHN
Damn…  That sort of sucks.
 
DAVID
Sorry bro.
 
JOHN
Damn.
 
(The End)

January 1, 2011
Happy New Year, 2011

(JEREMY and STEVE are at a New Year’s Party, surrounded by FRIENDS.  They’re both holding glasses of champagne.  They clink glasses, and drink)
 
JEREMY
That’s not bad…
 
STEVE
Yeah…  it’ll do, it’ll do…
 
JEREMY
Happy New Year!
 
STEVE
You too man… hope it’s a good one.
 
JEREMY
Yeah… wow… two thousand and eleven…
 
STEVE
Did you make any resolutions?

JEREMY
Nah, man… I don’t do that…
 
STEVE
Oh…  yeah… I think you told me that last year.
 
JEREMY
Did I?
 
STEVE
Yeah – you said they were lame for you, but not me… seeing as I had made a bunch of resolutions and all…
 
JEREMY
Oh… I see… I see… yeah, I don’t remember that but yeah, okay… I guess they’re just lame for me.  Not for you for example.
 
STEVE
Yeah.
 
JEREMY
So how did they work out?

STEVE
What?
 
JEREMY
Your resolutions… from last year…  how’d those work out for you?
 
STEVE
Oh.  I mean…  I guess fine.  I’m still here and all.
 
JEREMY
Yeah, but what I’m askin’ is if you got any of them done. 
 
STEVE
My resolutions?
 
JEREMY
Yeah… those things… that you resolved to do.  Did you do ‘em?
 
STEVE
I mean…  yeah…  I guess so… I’m pretty sure I did.
 
JEREMY
Like… what… for example?
 
STEVE
You want an example?
 
JEREMY
Yeah.
 
STEVE
Ok, sure…  it’s just that… you told me to keep ‘em private.

JEREMY
What?

STEVE
Last year… when I was going to tell you what my resolutions were… you suggested I keep ‘em to myself.
 
JEREMY
Did I?
 
STEVE
Yeah.
 
JEREMY
You sure about that?

STEVE
Yeah… I am.  I mean, I would tell you all about ‘em, but I think that was good advice… not to go on about it.  I mean – who wants to hear about that?
 
JEREMY
Yeah.  Still, maybe it could be inspirational – like how you made a resolution and then it changed your life and all.
 
STEVE
Nah man – there was nothing like that.
 
JEREMY
No?

STEVE
No.
 
JEREMY
Oh.  Okay… Well, still… happy two thousand and eleven.
 
STEVE
Same to you bro.  Have a good one.
 
(The End)
 

December 31, 2010
Getting ready for New Years

 
(JOANNE and STEPHANIE are walking down a street in New York)  
 
JOANNE
So what are you guys doing for New Years?
 
STEPHANIE
Oh the usual…  he puts on the tux, I put on a gown, we head out to the Stevenson’s place for cocktails, and then to that thing at the museum, and then over to Betty’s for her big blowout.
 
JOANNE
Oh wow, that’s a busy night!
 
STEPHANIE
Yes, it gets a little crazy, but we enjoy it.  And what are you doing?
 
JOANNE
Me?  Uhm…  well..  you know…  I don’t really do much for New Years.
 
STEPHANIE
No?  You’re not going out?
 
JOANNE
No…  I think I’ll just stay in tonight.  You know… those parties… they’re… what?  They’re just people…   at parties.
 
STEPHANIE
Yeah.  That’s true.  That’s all they are.  People… having fun…
 
JOANNE
Yeah…   
 
STEPHANIE
Okay, well, hope you have a good New Years!
 
JOANNE
Thanks…  you too…
 
(The End)
 

December 22, 2010
Good and Evil

 
(JOANNE and STEPHANIE are sitting in a bar.  ALEX is bartending).
 
JOANNE
Do you think anything can be said to be clearly good or clearly evil?
 
STEPHANIE
Absolutely.
 
JOANNE
What for example?
 
STEPHANIE
Extra-large caramel mocha cappuccino with nutella cream.
 
JOANNE
Which one is that?  Clearly good or clearly evil?
 
STEPHANIE
Absolutely.   Clearly good or clearly evil.
 
JOANNE
I don’t think you’re grasping this hypothetical.
 
STEPHANIE
I think I am.
 
JOANNE
Let’s start again…
 
STEPHANIE
How do you like that beer?
 
JOANNE
What?
 
STEPHANIE
The beer…  do you like it?
 
JOANNE
I mean… sure.  It’s good.
 
STEPHANIE
But what if it were brewed by a company owned by a guy who holds stock in a company that invests in a project that supports another guy who gives money to terrorists? 
 
ALEX
Do you two want another round?
 
JOANNE
Yes please…
 
(The End)
 
 
 
 
 

December 21, 2010
Lunar Eclipse

(GEORGIA and STEPHANIE are in a café,  having breakfast)

GEORGIA
Did you see the lunar eclipse last night?
 
STEPHANIE
Yeah…  I don’t see what the big deal was.
 
GEORGIA
It was awesome!
 
STEPHANIE
Really?
 
GEORGIA
Sure…   the Earth got in the way between the sun and the moon, and the moon disappeared!  Isn’t that awesome?
 
STEPHANIE
The moon disappears every month.  It’s called a new moon.
 
GEORGIA
But this is totally different!  It only happens when there is a full moon!  When there’s a new moon, it’s just the moon being between the sun and the earth.  So it’s totally different…
 
STEPHANIE
I dunno… it looked the same to me…  no moon in the sky.  It’s not like we don’t see that once a month…
 
GEORGIA
Yes but this was…
 
STEPHANIE
Different… yeah, I get that the cause was different.  But the effect is the same.  No moon.
 
GEORGIA
Okay, okay… geez…
 
STEPHANIE
Sorry, I just didn’t find it all that interesting.
 
GEORGIA
Yeah, I got that.
 
(The End)
 

December 20, 2010
Holiday Season, Take two

 
 
(JOANNE and STEPHANIE are sitting in their living room, opposite a huge Christmas tree).
 
JOANNE
We’re not getting each other anything expensive this year, right?
 
STEPHANIE
That’s what we said.
 
JOANNE
I just want to make sure…  like… that you don’t go out and get something expensive, and then I feel bad about not getting you something expensive.
 
STEPHANIE
Don’t worry about it… it’s the thought the counts, not how much it costs.
 
JOANNE
Yes, but we agreed…
 
STEPHANIE
Well, actually, you explained that you didn’t want us to get each other anything expensive…  you made that clear…
 
JOANNE
I knew it…  I knew you would go ahead… 
 
STEPHANIE
Christmas is a time of giving…
 
JOANNE
That is just so… manipulative…
 
STEPHANIE
Manipulative?  Like… trying to control what I do or don’t do?
 
JOANNE
Control?  I wasn’t trying to…
 
STEPHANIE
You do it all the time; you say what we’re going to do or not do, and then it’s something we agreed to…

JOANNE
Well, if you feel that way…
 
STEPHANIE
That’s the way it is. 
 
JOANNE
Ok… well…  ok.  Whatever.
 
STEPHANIE
Merry Christmas.
 
(The End)
 

December 19, 2010
Holiday Season

(JOHN and SANDRA are shopping in a department store.  They pass the store’s SANTA,  and are surrounded by holiday decorations).
 
SANDRA
Don’t you love this time of year?
 
JOHN
Of course!  It’s Christmas time!
 
SANDRA
Yay!  Christmas!
 
JOHN
Yay!
 
SANDRA
It’s such a hopeful, joyous time!
 
JOHN
Yeah… and then comes New Year’s!
 
SANDRA
Yay!  Won’t that be fun?
 
JOHN
It will be awesome!
 
SANDRA
Yup… entering the new year… so full of hope… and… joy.
 
JOHN
Yup… and then… hmm.

SANDRA
Oh, yes! And then… well..   January….  yes….  uhm… January.
 
JOHN
Yay?
 
(The End)
 

September 20, 2010
C

(CARL calls CALVIN closer) 
 
 
CARL
Calvin!
 
CALVIN
Carl?

CARL
Close call…
 
CALVIN
CIA can’t comment.
 
CARL
Calvin…Clandestine cash could corrupt CIA’s critics…
 
CALVIN
Covert courts curtailed CIA compensating criminals.
 
CARL
Certain criminals can’t come calling Congress…  couldn’t CIA constrain consequences?
 
CALVIN
CIA can’t comment, can’t counsel, can’t criticize, can’t create concerns.
 
CARL
Can’t CIA commit? 
 
CALVIN
Carl…
 
CARL
Calvin…  crises can come…
 
CALVIN
Cool… collateral crises could create CIA cash, causing change, creating causes, clearing core cooperatives.  Come, crisis, come…. carefree careers can crater…  concern counters CIA cynics counseling cuts.  
 
CARL
Cold… Calvin..  cold.
 
(The End)